Nursing--where my heart is. :)

Oh well, I haven't realized how fast time flies. It's already been, two weeks and I wasn't able to update my blog. Now i'm starting to feel the real feeling of being a 3rd year nursing student in college. 3rd year life is what they say "the most challenging, tiring, but definitely the most fun" year in college--now I'm starting to see why. :P

Taking up nursing isn't easy. Aside from having to memorize lots of information: normal values, signs and symptoms of diseases, drug names and infos, not to mention their actions and interactions in the body and many other concepts ,I also have to deal with my fear of blood. yikes! But still, I looove being a student nurse--a soon to be nurse. =) It's always an overwhelming feeling seeing other people smile because they know that there is someone who is willing to help them in the course of their sickness, whenever I see a patient get well and go out of the hospital, it makes me happy knowing that even for a tiny bit, I've actually made a difference in someone's life. :)

As the saying goes, " Nursing is all about caring. But it takes more than caring to learn how to be a nurse. "  :)

Last week, I've been assigned in the Operating room for two days. (boy, it was tiriiiiiing. ) It made me realize how taking a sit even for just a few minutes feels soooo good. :) Laerning how to be a good nurse is never easy. You have to be mentally as well as physically prepared for changing environments. You can't just quit  if you feel like it. You take your lessons and studies by heart and you'll realize that despite the fact that it is tiring,  you'll enjoy it. :)  As for me, I'll do my best to learn how to be a good nurse in the future. Someday, somehow, I'll  happy knowing that I've made a difference in one's life. :)

Nurses may not be angels. But they are the next best thing. :)

Wasted emotions.

"What goes around, comes around. " --If you want good karma, live your life according to Dharma.

But from how I see it, maybe you don't even believe in such things. Pathetic.>_< I won't listen to you anymore, nor will I believe anything you'd say or do.

Liars will always be liars.You don't have to pretend anymore, don't get caught up with your own lies, I've already figured it out.

You guys are so good at pretending, you were able to fool me, not just once, but twice.

But twice is too much already. Get a life. You don't have any space in my life anymore. nor in my memories. All of you are starting to be like just a fading light that will soon fade away in the distance. Go to those people who you consider as important. Afterall, they're more valuable to you.

Why do some would pretend like they care for you from the bottom of their hearts but then after you turn around even for just a split second, everything changes-- you're their laughing stock, someone they bluntly mock at in front of others. damn!

Pathetic people. Great pretenders.

With all of their b****h***. (Sorry for the term. I just feel frustrated with what I've learned. I just thought...

Oh well. I guess I was wrong.  >_<)

Sure, you'd come near me and pretend as if you're one of the best comforters I know, --don't do that anymore, I'm not that stupid for me not to figure out that little evil scheme of yours.

You just wait and see.

Someday.

Someday...

My First Delivery Room Case

Finally, with still shaking hands, I had my first actual deliveryy experience at the delivery room tonight! I was assigned on the delivery room with the 3-11pm shift, when I arrived there, there were some patients waiting but all of them were CS patients, we still had to wait who are for normal delivery. I thought I would never get the chance (again) to assist an actual delivery, but then, tadaaaa. At more or less 10pm tonight, I was able to assist in one. Thank you Lord the delivery was successful! :) It's really an overwhelming and happy feeling that I'm able to experience assisting a delivery! :)

I want to thank my midwife groupmates for the encouragement and tips that you told me, its really been great help, (especially I still have not overcomed my hemophobia. I really appreciate your words. :) ) And also to my partner/ partner-in-crime. :P (hehe) Erika for your patience. :D

I know I still have more to learn and skills to master but today is a great start and motivation to do better in the days yet to come. :)

I'll just share with you a quote I found over the net, :)

"Attending births is like growing roses. You have to marvel at the ones that just open up and bloom at the first kiss of the sun but you wouldn't dream of pulling open the petals of the tightly closed buds and forcing them to blossom to your time line." Gloria Lemay

So, I'm off for now! :) I still have my duty tomorrow, same time, same area. :)

Have a great day!

A message for the heavens above.

.

JULY 3.
A date I will always remember. Three years ago, it was the date that came without warning. a day that changed our lives forever.

I suddenly missed you ate Len. :( I know I shouldn't think of you most of the time so as not to disturb you in heaven, but there were times that you would appear in my dreams, those dreams seemed so real: you were there with us, laughing, smiling, playing and talking with us--so close, yet so far; I can see your smiling face yet its as if when I try to reach out or touch your hands, I can't, its as if I was contented then just with your presence, even a glimpse of you in my dreams every once in a while is enough for me.

Those dreams that I can remember were just like the times when you were still with us, always happy. Laging masaya pag kasama ka, feel at home ako lagi anytime, anywhere, basta anjan ka ate.
If only i could direct my dreams then and there, I'll hug you tight for a looooong time. But sadly, dreams are just dreams, I can't direct it the way I want because it wouldn't be a dream anymore, but just imagination. But still, I'm thankful for those once in a while dreams, I'm able to see you even for a few hours. But then, when I;m on the edge of believing that your presence in my dreams is not just an illusion, reality would sink in and I would wake up, just like every other morning and you won't be here anymore---it just makes me miss you more. :( I guess I'll just have to wait when you would again appear in my dreams. :/

Namimiss na kita ate len. :( I know that you're happy now up there in heaven, iniisip ko nalang pag minsan nasa abroad ka lang far far away from here and someday, somehow, we'll meet again.

You're already an angel up there in heaven and that you're watching over us, I just wanted to share how much i miss you, my ate, my confidante, my playmate, my cousin, my bestfriend, my role model as I was growing up, who always listens to my stories, gives me advices, someone who never cease to put a smile to my face, my ate len. :(

I miss you very much ate Len :( You'll always be in our mind and in our hearts. I love you!

Love,
Sandra