Tiny Hand With Red Heart

Thursday, July 18, 2013

Love---The Second Time Around.

They say, love is sweeter the second time around. But what if you never got to have a second time with that person? Would you be brave enough to start another love with another person?

I think, the second time that you will fall in love with someone; it’s going to feel different. Well of course, because when you had your heart broken on your first, you learn things.

The first time was a series of firsts indeed. It felt almost like a dream. You never experienced how it feels like to be engulfed by love and so you accepted love with open arms, embraced the exhilarating feeling of being drowned by your emotions for the first time.

But unfortunately, things don’t go well and you find yourself alone when it fell apart. You change your view on things. When it fell apart and you were left with a broken heart, your perspective changes. You realize that not all sweet beginnings could have their happy endings, that people could be so cruel and break your heart; that not all promises can be fulfilled; that sometimes, words uttered during your early days as a couple could eventually stop meaning anything as feelings start to fade. And that, after a seemingly happily-ever-after story, your world is turned upside down; and so you shut your feelings down.

But no matter how much effort you put into shutting down your feelings, things go unplanned, and there’s this someone willing to exert their very best effort to take down your walls to start creating their love story with you. So after sometime, when you find yourself go into it again, the cycle of love that is, you’re going to keep in mind everything that you’ve learned. And so you remind yourself, “I’ll take another chance on this, but in which case, I would like some advance warning.”

The second time around, or maybe even your third or fourth one, it’s natural that you tend to compare it with your first love. At some point during the beginning of another love, you find yourself comparing teeny-tiny details like, “He/She never gave a comment about my eating habits, why does this one care so much?” or “His/Her eyes are the same as my ex’s eyes.”; the list could go on a long way, and you feel like you need a map to show how to go on with your feelings. That’s okay; you’re starting a new love with someone new and unfamiliar to you— so it’s just normal that you are skeptical and wary. You just have to ask your new love for directions, plus the learning you’ve had from your previous ones, you’ll be okay with that.

The second time around, you feel as if you don’t know where to start and how you’ll go with your feelings. You find yourself asking, “How do you I do this again?”  It’s going to be scary at first, but you’ll realize, falling in love is just like riding a bike and getting bruised for the first time, you never really forget.

And let me tell you, the second time is not the first time, so no matter how stuck you may have been on your first, you have to let go of those feelings so that you can experience another; because you can never really fall in love for the second, third or fourth time with another person if you’re still stuck on your feelings with your first.  The first time will always have that special place in your heart; it’s a magical gift of life that you can never reclaim, but the best part of that first love is that you learned.

No love story is the same as the first, second or third one. Because love is like taking a leap of faith; a gamble with the unknown, and you can never know what will happen with any relationship you currently have at the moment. But I guess, anything can last as long as both of you will exert your very best efforts to make it work. Feelings don’t fade. You may say that you don’t love him/her anymore, but deep inside you, you know for a fact that the feelings will always be there, and that you will always care.


(Photo's not mine. Credits to the owner.)

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